IMY

The memory of those days being with you were keep flashing through my mind...

It's been a year...

but,

everything had changed!

I miss you so badly. I wish to hear you call me dear once again. Im getting even more hurt than before, i felt sad & depress without you being my side. I don't understand urs feeling as well as mine. I just can't stop myself to care of you and treat you good. argh... Im just being the way of hurting myself more and more.

I still care of you... Do you really care me like before?

tell me what should i do... IM LOST :(

babe, IMY!

nonsense

Looking back the days, I never know it would make me cried...

All the happiness & love disappear out of the sudden!
I wonder why you gave me that much and at the end, you took away everything from me.
You pull me out from darkness and then you turn my sky into grey.
You teach me how to breathe, but you don't give me oxygen.
You stick back my heart yet you tore it apart.

我很难过，

你知道吗？

为什么，

你要这样伤害我？

你不知道的事

她的难受，
你感觉不到

她在哭泣，
你听不到

她的付出，
你看不见

她的一切
你不在乎

你的世界，
没有她的存在

她依然没有放弃你

虽然
这一切的一切
很沉重，
背负着伤痕，
难过得好累，
还有无法诉说的痛与苦，
但为了你
她愿意承受这一切！

失望

早已习惯，
你
一次又一次的
伤害

早已习惯，
你
一次又一次的
忽冷忽热

早已习惯，
你
一次又一次的
利用我

早已习惯，
你
一次又一次的
自私

早已习惯
让
自己沉浸在
一层又一层的
谎言中

眼泪麻醉不了伤痛
笑容催眠不了沮丧
好想好好走下去
却连一步都无法迈进

我累了。。。

这个游戏，
我玩不起，
我投降了。

The celebration for last day of 21 years old

09 - 11 - 2010
I had a small yet special celebration for my coming 22 years old birthday!!
Although it is not a luxury celebration,
im satisfied with it :)
because i have you with me... *seriously im so damn grateful*
the most disappointing part is where i don't hv the chance to blow candles, make a wish & cut my cake.
i have a nice & enjoying night ~
This is my first time i celebrate the day before my birthday
This is the first time there is someone beside me to greet me happy birthday when it hits 12am on my day...
Thanks for everything ~

our dinner on that day

the so called 'birthday cake'
wonder to light up the candle for it

Am i deserve ur love & ur care?

♥ the first present i received ♥

kinda surprised that u prepare present for me :p


i treasure it ♥

its the time for it...

回不去的从前

如果我的消失，
会让你着急，
哪怕只是一点点，
我也会选择
离开你的世界
永远不再出现
我怀念的
是当初你对我的那份关怀，
我向往的
是以往与你同在的那一刻
我爱着的
是回忆里的那个你

This is my OctOBER

F'king day ever...

It's friday and it supposedly to be relax and nice day. Yet it was not. I been busy for the whole morning. Im trying to get my work done and been rushing with all i can to get everything ready and complete. But, i failed... Kinda depressed! Even though my stomach pain like hell, my back cause me suffer that much, i don't even bother on it :'( *I hate pms during my working time*

Frustrating is all i get from time to time...

Lack of determination.
Lack of strong mentality.
Sighs.. *Wondering whether i can cope with it and get over with it soon*
The same question keep pestering my mind:" Am i suppose to leave now and look for better opportunity?" or "Should i continue with what deserve to?"

The night... - bbq steamboat buffet -

I can't really enjoys and have fun. I was trying so hard to hide it. Then only i realise it is hard and tough to be act as normal when you're really not. Burst into tears when home... At the moment, there is no one for me to turn to. I don't know who can i find for that minute. Previously the one who is always there for me no longer appear. I know i couldn't find him anymore when i have something to tell.

standing at the crossroads

it is so hazy

and i cant see the light

lost in my way...

Put a smile on face :)

I had the worst feeling today...
All the troublesome conquer my mind badly
I don't wanna think about it
yet i just cant get rid of it from my mind..
WHat the HELL man...
I really don't know what is actually in his mind
& how i gonna face him
Please don't fool me again and again..
I can't resist

I will smiles
whenever i can
wherever i go....
EVerything gonna be alright ~

10.10.10

The day is so blue without you...

You'll never know how much i wish to have your companion. I know i had disqualified to voice out my wants neither to request anything. I can't expect anything again... never and never...

I still remember the day of 09.09.09. It had been a nice and wonderful day as i have them together with me. Buddies who are being with me in my 3 years degree life :) *appreciated them alot* imissyouguys...

Today is 10.10.10 and i feel so moody. The feeling of being left alone is so damn bitter.

when the wound had been dig out again,

all the pressure and burden of pain push me down

hardly to breath...

i can't sense you in the air surrounded me again...

OCTober rOCK ♥

There are plenty of troubles happened on me during this period. I'm really sick of it. Will the coming month bring me luck and everything gonna be smoothly?

The day he walked away, i being silent and left everything to myself. I put all the blame on myself and try to be good. I guess l had learned a lesson from him and also others. Im glad and appreciated something unexpected happen since two weeks ago. I dare not to request or question anything even though i wish to know. Im always wondering... Yet i will accept all the fact. A GAME is just a GAME. When it started, it will continue till it come to the time of GAME OVER.

*Are there any memories that can be delete permanently?*
*what does it means when you said you can't delete me from your mind?*
*and where were you when i need you the most at crucial period?*
*do you actually look into my eyes, put me in mind?*
*Stop thinking nonsense, TANYIQIAN!!!*

A real working life
Being in the real working life is not as fun as i thought. First day of working, it is nice to meet and know so many people there. However, everything is so new to me. I felt so strange. EVeryone are there for me, all friends and family are giving full support to me. I really don't wish to disappointed them. I got no confident to cope with it yet i must force myself to adapt and get over on it. *support & hugs are all i long for*

Audit really my cup of tea?
I hope i can find out the answer in real soon... perhaps after 3 months!

My ♥ midnight blue
A BIG SHOCKED to myself and everyone. I bang my car to the cement due to my careless. At that point of time, I was shocked until i dont know what to do. I took my phone and gave a call to my dad. My new car got serious damage :( (inside & outside). I really feel very heartache when i saw it. This really cause me fear to drive. argh.. why am i being so careless and panic..
From this incident, i know that everyone around me really care and sayang me alot. I appreciated it. The question that all of you asked me was in my mind. THE FIRST response that everyone gave is "are you hurt? are you injured?" Thanks ppl... im fine!

Count down one month - CHAPTER 22 new working life
Im excited that having a month of waiting period. LOL... *making alot of wish*
Can i have a special one? Will my previous wish accomplish in this year?
Wondering...

我努力的

让自己好起来

反省

问题总是出现在我身上
事情总是重复的再发生

我需要反省
我需要改变
我需要学习
我需要努力
我需要坚强
我需要勇气
我需要放手
我需要放开
我需要开心
我需要支持
我需要强心剂

往后的日子
我会好好过
不让你再失望
不让你再对我心灰
不让你再为我而烦恼

blur yet awake

I ENJOY DRINKING :)

I need it

to free myself

from

MIND TORTURING

tipsy @_@